Progress Takes Time, Stepmom!

According to researchers, it takes about four to seven years for stepfamilies to blend or bond. During this time, your stepfamily is evolving and growing, just as your relationship with your partner is. Even though it may not feel like it, progress is happening. If you think back to when you first started dating or got married, you’ll realize how your stepfamily dynamics have changed over time.

Crossing a Suspension Bridge

As stepmoms, we tend to be cautious in what we say and do since the bond is fragile in the beginning. I liken it to walking on a suspension bridge. As you’re walking across the bridge, you can feel the bridge swaying back and forth. You slow your pace and try to stay balanced as the bridge is moving below your feet. You’re making progress, but it takes longer to cross the bridge, and you have an unsteady feeling as you’re going across. It takes patience, strength, and resolve to make it to the other side. This is a perfectly natural feeling when you are traversing a shaky bridge or navigating a fragile relationship.

Making progress across the bridge

How can we make it smoother?

Of course, each stepfamily will have its own set of challenges depending on their unique circumstances. Research has shown that when you attempt a big challenge, it can seem overwhelming. However, when you break it down into a series of small steps, that challenge is achievable. These small steps are known as bridge challenges because they bridge the gap between what you see as possible and impossible. You’ll find 21 small steps that you can take to provide the foundation for change in Stepmom Bootcamp. Above all, remember that true change and growth comes out of these small steps or experiences. In the words of Frederick Douglass, “If there is no struggle, there is no progress.”