Stepmoms, are you getting enough quality time with your partner? Do you have regular date nights? Or have your date nights been replaced by watching TV together on the couch? When was the last time you and your partner laughed and had fun together? Hopefully, you’re getting out and having fun with your partner, but the reality is that it can be a struggle to get that quality time. Between work schedules, parenting schedules, and the demands of daily life obligations, our relationships often fall to the bottom of our list of priorities. Don’t let that happen! Having a strong foundation with our partner is especially important in a stepfamily because we need that foundation, built on love, trust, and quality time, to give us the strength to handle day-to-day challenges in our stepfamily life. However, you might need to get creative in order to get that quality time for your relationship.
Maximizing Quality Time with a Microadventure
Going on a weekend getaway or taking a vacation together may not be feasible with your parenting schedule, activities, or work demands. Plus, it can take a lot of planning! Instead of planning something elaborate, why not try going on a microadventure with your partner? Now, you may be wondering what the heck a microadventure is. The term was coined by adventurer Alastair Humphreys in 2012 and has been gaining in popularity ever since. According to Collins dictionary, a microadventure is an “adventure close to home.” An even better definition is provided by the New York Times– “short, perspective-shifting bursts of travel closer to home.” Sounds alluring, right? Who wouldn’t want to go on a microadventure?!
Microadventure Rules for Stepfamilies
Now, I hate to make rules for something that is supposed to be fun, but it’s necessary! There is actually only one rule for your microadventure, but it is a very important rule. Here it is: for parents and stepparents– no talking about your kids, stepkids, custody battle, stepfamily drama or anything related to the stepfamily while you’re on your microadventure. During your microadventure, it’s just you and your partner. For these two or three hours, forget about everything else, and just enjoy the time together.
Our Microadventure…A Mixed Bag
My husband and I took this rule very seriously when we embarked on our microadventure. We had quite a few ideas on what to do, but we settled on trying out a Thai restaurant in our new neighborhood and going paddleboarding at a local lake. The restaurant was delicious– the food was so beautifully presented that it was actually like a form of art. It was almost too pretty to eat!
Paddleboarding, on the other hand, was not quite as I expected. I seemed to be a natural on the board because I had no trouble balancing, but I couldn’t paddle very fast. My naturally athletic husband was the opposite. He had difficulty balancing, but he could paddle pretty fast, so he ended up getting quite a distance in front of me. This wasn’t so bad because I was enjoying the nice day, but the part that bothered me was there were so many dead fish floating in the lake! Apparently, the fish had died because some of the species couldn’t handle the unnaturally cold weather we’d been having lately and some of the fish died due to a particular kind of algae growing in the water. The result? A LOT of dead fish and a very strong smell! (Those poor fish!) And I didn’t want to touch the water or hit the dead fish with my board! Needless to say, our paddleboarding adventure didn’t last the full 90 minutes we had reserved.
Every minute counts
We had the best time, and even though we didn’t travel far, it was worth every minute we spent together. We still laugh about the stinky lake water and about how we didn’t want to touch the water. And the Thai restaurant is our new favorite date night spot! So, my question to you is: when can you set aside some precious time with your partner to go on a microadventure? Think of a fun hike you can go on together or a new place you can explore. While a weekend getaway is wonderful, a few hours spent together on a microadventure is just as precious. You might need to get inventive in how you carve out that time, but start planning it!
I’d like to hear about your microadventure! Where would you like to go? What would you like to do? Share your ideas in the comments!